The funniest shit ever (true story)

this is NOT my story just some guys......ENJOY! ^^

Well, I debated all day whether I should share with what happened to me last night, so since I can't tell my family i'll tell you internet strangers my story.

Ok it was my cheat day on a bulking diet, so I put away about 8000 calories including a lot of alcohol last night. Im at the usual weekend parties and i've been talking to this girl for the majority of the night. She's 17, so still a little on the immature side, but im only 19 so its all good.

Anyway i've talked to this girl a few times before, and to make a long story short I ended up going back with her to her room. About another 8 shots later, we end up fooling around on her bed, didnt bang her, but did pretty much everything else.

So about 10min's into her giving me head, I had to drop the fattest shit in my life. All my meals were followed by 3tsp of metamucil so I could get lots of fiber in me to combat the carbs a little. Anyway im holdin my #2 in and finally it goes away. We both end up passing out on her bed, she's butt naked and im in my boxers.

I must have passed out about 10min after she did around 3am. I wake up at about 8am to piss and I find myself covered in shit. Im thinking WTF, and what happened was I shit myself when I was sleeping. It was all over the bed, sheets,etc.... Im freakin out so I did the most horrible thing in the world.

She's sleeping with her back towards me, so I take my boxers off, scoop up some shit and gently smear it on the inside of her butt, her lower back, and a little on the back of ther hammies. I get dressed and leave LOL This poor girl is gonna think she did it. I didnt know what else to do though. Anyway, im really gonna have to avoid her and I have no clue what im gonna do when I end up running into her.

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  • 5

    lol man your one funnyass motherfucker plus to the fuckin 3

    • gryxng
    • August 8, 2010, 7:21 pm
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  • 4

    noooo.....
    *whisper-just dont tell anyone-whisper*
    whisper - the funniest shit ever (true story)

    Reply
  • 3

    lolz kit kat we no it was u i was at tht party wit u dude lolz jk

    Reply
  • 2

    That's an awesome solution to a horrible problem.

    I have a friend who would sleep walk in the middle of the night to the bathroom and take a piss. He did this whenever he got really drunk. Many times he would be at a strangers house and in his sleep think their closet was the bathroom. Needless to say, he ruined quite a few pairs of shoes.

    It sucks just what can happen to you when you black out drink, but most the time you get a good story out of it.

    • Albane
    • August 9, 2010, 5:48 am
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  • 2

    rubbing crap into a girls ass crack. I think ill pass.

    Reply
  • 1

    I heard another version of that story ages ago where the girl had anal sex with some random guy and shit herself afterwards, turned him over onto it so it looked like it was him, cleaned herself and then woke him up shouting at him for being a sick freak, etc.

    • Dannyl
    • August 9, 2010, 2:29 am
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  • 1

    Holy shit i just shot coffee out of my nose

    Reply
  • 1

    O_o Omg i still cant stop laughing

    Reply
  • 1

    Ima sexcond that man, This is the greatest way to start a day on sharenator.... Epppiiiiccccc!!! haha

    Reply
  • 1

    Rofl Lmao you are Awesome!!! you just made my day

    Reply
  • 1

    This happened to my friend in gainesville like ten years ago. He left a note on the girls table saying "you disgusting bitch you shit the bed" and then left. never saw her again

    Reply
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