because...
1. he never passed his drivers test
2. he has NEVER had a girlfriend
3. he works at a dead end job
4. his only friend is a dumbass
5. he owns a snail
Madam, I think you will find that spongebob is pretty damn awesome. And if you disagree.. How can I put this nicely... Get the fuck out of my interwebs.
It's your #0 visit here. It's about time to stop lurking!
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1. he never passed his drivers test
2. he has NEVER had a girlfriend
3. he works at a dead end job
4. his only friend is a dumbass
5. he owns a snail
*facepalm*