Funny Text Messages - Dear...
Dear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection. Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely,
Logic
Dear Icebergs,
Sorry to hear about the global warming. Karma’s a bitch.
Sincerely,
The Titanic
Dear J.K. Rowling,
Your books are entirely unrealistic.. I mean, a ginger kid with two friends?
Sincerely,
Anonymous
Dear America,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely,
Canada
Dear 2010,
So I hear the best rapper is white and the president is black? WTF happened?!
Sincerely,
1985
Dear Windshield Wipers,
Can’t touch this.
Sincerely,
That Little Triangle
Dear Rose,
There was definitely room on that door for the both of us.
Sincerely,
Jack
PS, you let go
Dear Saturn,
I liked it, so I put a ring on it.
Sincerely,
God
Dear Fox News,
So far, no news about foxes.
Sincerely,
Unimpressed
Dear jf;ldsfa/kvsmmklnn,
Please lknvfdmv.xvn.
Sincerely,
Stevie Wonder
Dear Nickleback,
That’s enough.
Sincerely,
The World
Dear Skin-Colored Band Aids,
Please make one for every skin color.
Sincerely,
Black people
Dear Scissors,
I feel your pain…..no one wants to run with me either.
Sincerely,
Sarah Palin
Dear Mary,
Just admit that you slept with someone else. This is getting out of hand.
Sincerely,
Joseph
And my personal favorite:
Dear Yahoo,
I’ve never heard anyone say, “I don’t know, let’s Yahoo! it…” just
saying…
Sincerely,
Google
--
I've got a few more of these if you guys like them. Let me know and I'll post the others.
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection. Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely,
Logic
Dear Icebergs,
Sorry to hear about the global warming. Karma’s a bitch.
Sincerely,
The Titanic
Dear J.K. Rowling,
Your books are entirely unrealistic.. I mean, a ginger kid with two friends?
Sincerely,
Anonymous
Dear America,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely,
Canada
Dear 2010,
So I hear the best rapper is white and the president is black? WTF happened?!
Sincerely,
1985
Dear Windshield Wipers,
Can’t touch this.
Sincerely,
That Little Triangle
Dear Rose,
There was definitely room on that door for the both of us.
Sincerely,
Jack
PS, you let go
Dear Saturn,
I liked it, so I put a ring on it.
Sincerely,
God
Dear Fox News,
So far, no news about foxes.
Sincerely,
Unimpressed
Dear jf;ldsfa/kvsmmklnn,
Please lknvfdmv.xvn.
Sincerely,
Stevie Wonder
Dear Nickleback,
That’s enough.
Sincerely,
The World
Dear Skin-Colored Band Aids,
Please make one for every skin color.
Sincerely,
Black people
Dear Scissors,
I feel your pain…..no one wants to run with me either.
Sincerely,
Sarah Palin
Dear Mary,
Just admit that you slept with someone else. This is getting out of hand.
Sincerely,
Joseph
And my personal favorite:
Dear Yahoo,
I’ve never heard anyone say, “I don’t know, let’s Yahoo! it…” just
saying…
Sincerely,
--
I've got a few more of these if you guys like them. Let me know and I'll post the others.
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Posted: 2011-04-28 16:12:28
Psst.
Responses (17) / Sorted by points
Lulz! I'll have to find them again. I kinda lost them after a month.
Not only for you. More people have to want them. Not wasting my time for one person, no matter how super awesome they are.
Well at least I'm super awesome. I'll take it!
Looks like no one else likes it. If you really want me to, I will post the rest for you though.
I like the Windshield Wipers one and the Canada to America one.
well Canada hit us with a giant bomb there but we couldnt let it be. We had to go and fuck the whole world and produce Rebecca Black so stop trying to have the most annoying singer countries!! Theres no reason to have competition for worst singer my ears cant take it
Lets hope no one! if i hear of a new upcoming star im not listening period
so you wont llisten to me? Cause im goin out for American Idol!
ehh ill think about it but i dont watch American idol. it got real boring
really? Cause some contestant kissed the woman judge.
