You don't find Chuck Norris... Chuck Norris finds you... ALSO.... in Soviet Russia... Chuck Norris still finds YOU! :O

Jesus walked on water, Chuck Norris swam though land.

Chuck Norris doesn't consider it sex if the women survives. =D

there are no normal facts about chuck norris. everything about him is abnormal.

Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

chuck norris played russian rulette with a fully loaded gun and won
chuck norris counted to infinity twice
chuck norris once kicked so hard that his foot traveled through time and killed amelia earheart during her last flight

while chuck norris was on holiday in spain, he ate some bad paella, causing him to take the largest shit known to man. that shit is now france

and also

in soviet russia. HAT WEARS YOU!
in soviet russia. PRESETNTS OPEN YOU!
in soviet russia. the fool pities mr t

If you have £5 and chuck norris has £5 chuck norris has more money than uou

chuck noris dont mowe his lawn, he simply stairs at the grass and dairs it to grow!!!!!

Chuck Norris can see around corners with his penis.
If Mr. T. and Chuck Norris walked into the same building that building would explode because the awesomeness could not be contained.
One day Chuck Norris decided to pee in a can and sell it, we now know this drink as red bull.

Chuck Norris had sex before his dad did

the drummer from def leapord has one arm.... chuck norris needed a back scratcher

these are all great but, i bet that chuck norris couldnt beat the only man as fucksome (fucking awesome) as himself, and thats chuck fucking norris!

In soviet russia, chuck norris still roundhouse kicks you for disgracing his name with your thoughts..

Chuck Norris got the whoop ass in the can.

if you can see chuck norris, chuck norris can see you. if you cant see chuck norris, you have seconds left

Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, Happy Chanukah! (i think that's how it's spelled)

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