1. Have confidence. Chicks dig Confidence.
2. Details matter, so pay attention at all times.
3. If you make eye contact with a hot girl, don’t be the first one to break eye contact. It’s a game, and you lose when you look away first.
4. Talking to yourself is not useless. Never lie to yourself, especially about your motives. Why you do what you do is as important as what you do.
5. If you need to briefly turn the light on at night and don’t want to completely lose your night vision, keep one eye closed.
6. Talk to everyone like you would your best friend, and smile.
7. Be selfless. Put others before yourself. Not only is it personally rewarding it is often reciprocated. Be nice! Open doors for people. Let people turn when driving. Hold out chairs for people etc.
8. Cut negative people out of your life.(or with a knife) jk
9. Don’t be rude, but NEVER answer any cops questions when they call you in for questioning.
10. If you make eye contact with someone, smile and nod. You never when you’ll run into them again, and it’s better to seem friendly then socially awkward.
11. If you’re ever doing anyhing strange or unusual in public and you’re hassled, but don’t want to give a straight answer, look your questioner straight in the eye and declare with confidence “I’m making art, do you mind not interrupting?” You can get away with just about anything.
12. Honesty is a virtue. You’ll gain more respect if you’re always honest in your dealings. Don’t waste your own time dealing with dishonest people.
13. If you ever need an umbrella when out walking and it starts raining, go into the nearest restaurant and ask them if they found your umbrella. If they ask what it looks like, say it’s black.
14. Never chug anything over 40 proof.
15. Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, repeat until orgasm.
16. If you press the street crossing button 400 times, the light will change.
17. If you lean your head back and pretend to shake salt into your mouth from an imaginary salt shaker, you will taste salt. If it doesn’t work at first, try varying the rates of shaking. For some people you have to go slower but faster works for other people.
18. If an officer of the law is giving you trouble and asks you where you are going. The correct answer is HOME, unless you are clearly not headed in the right direction.
19. If you are speeding and suddenly up ahead see a cop that clearly just tagged you, slow down and wave to him/her. Your odds of being pulled over are quite a bit reduced.
20. If you get a ticket on the windshield of your car, you can potentially get away with parking illegal in the same lot for the rest of the day by keeping the ticket on your windshield.