11 Yearbook Photos That Musicians Wish We'd Never Seen

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Every once in a while, I write down a piece of advice I'd like to pass on to my kids one day. (In fact, these pieces of advice may soon form an 11Points list.) The addition that sparked this list: Take each yearbook photos as serious as life or death.

Because, more so than anything else that happens to you in high school, yearbook photos stay with you and have the potential to permanently haunt you. HAUNT.

Like, for example, the yearbook photos on this list. People in the music industry are all about their image. The image sells everything. As Jennifer Lopez proved, singing talent is among the least important, if not THE least important, determinant of record deals/album sales/industry success.

So here we're going to look at 11 people in the music industry whose yearbook photos completely and totally belie the marketing image their entire careers are based upon.

1. Avril Lavigne. We always knew we were being sold something with Avril... the whole suburban Canadian punk rock badass image all felt so corporate. Well... here's what she looked like before a record company slapped a few spiked bracelets and heavy eye makeup on her.

yearbook1 - 11 Yearbook Photos That Musicians Wish We'd Never Seen




2. Gene Simmons. His yearbook photo shows him back when he was Chaim Witz, a nice, well-groomed Jewish mensch. That was long before he put on face makeup, stuck his tongue out, and saved Santa.

yearbook2 - 11 Yearbook Photos That Musicians Wish We'd Never Seen




3. Eminem. I'm not sure if it's the mullet or the goofy, googly facial expression... but his yearbook photo completely belies his "I'm a giant dick" public persona. Somehow, though, you can still tell he was legit white trash.

yearbook3 - 11 Yearbook Photos That Musicians Wish We'd Never Seen




4. Tina Turner. Back when she was Annie Mae Bullock. It's not that she's necessarily unattractive... but she's frumpy to the point where no one could've predicted she'd have the face and body that launched a thousand drag queens.

yearbook4 - 11 Yearbook Photos That Musicians Wish We'd Never Seen




5. Benji Madden. Everything that Good Charlotte's ever done has been contrived. I intentionally chose a picture of modern Benji, with his strategic tattoos and piercings, standing in front of a Nickelodeon logo.

yearbook5 - 11 Yearbook Photos That Musicians Wish We'd Never Seen




6. Steven Tyler. Why... so... serious?

yearbook6 - 11 Yearbook Photos That Musicians Wish We'd Never Seen




7. Marilyn Manson. Marilyn Manson wasn't a strategically-calculated freakshow growing up. In fact... he wasn't even close.

yearbook7 - 11 Yearbook Photos That Musicians Wish We'd Never Seen




8. Madonna. Madonna in high school looks completely ready to be a seamstress or receptionist or housewife with a drinking problem. So it took some serious twists to quickly transition her into the Madonna on the right.

yearbook8 - 11 Yearbook Photos That Musicians Wish We'd Never Seen




9. Jim Morrison. How much does his yearbook photo scream, "Go to the local state university for four years, get a degree in architecture and eventually become a middle manager?"

yearbook9 - 11 Yearbook Photos That Musicians Wish We'd Never Seen




10. Prince. This is the only case where the yearbook photo makes the person look way tougher, cooler and more badass than the modern photo.

yearbook10 - 11 Yearbook Photos That Musicians Wish We'd Never Seen




11. Lil Jon. There are no words. Other than Whaaaaaaat?

yearbook11 - 11 Yearbook Photos That Musicians Wish We'd Never Seen





And finally, though the list of 11 is done, I have one epilogue note. Ryan Seacrest's not a musician like the rest, but thanks to "American Idol" and his radio show, he is connected to the music industry. And I would be doing you a disservice if I didn't bust out his image-shattering yearbook photo too.

yearbook12 - 11 Yearbook Photos That Musicians Wish We'd Never Seen










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Views: 8,165
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Posted: 2010-12-02 07:59:28
Psst.

Responses (17) / Sorted by points

Albane
Albane
Rank: #114
I love the description for #6. Steven Tyler.
Posted: 2010-12-02 08:00:04 Report Reply
Ertrov
Ertrov
Rank: #40
How could he possibly be related to Liv Tyler? Lol.
Posted: 2010-12-09 11:43:34 Report Reply
TexBex
TexBex
Rank: #55
Um how? He had sex with her mom, that's how.
Posted: 2010-12-09 11:46:03 Report Reply
Ertrov
Ertrov
Rank: #40
I meant because he's so ugly and she's, well, not. It was a joke.
Posted: 2010-12-09 12:32:25 Report Reply
TexBex
TexBex
Rank: #55
Yeah I got that. My explanation was *also* a joke. But I guess it's true what they say- if you have to explain comedy it's not funny
Posted: 2010-12-22 07:05:08 Report Reply
Ertrov
Ertrov
Rank: #40
So true. However I laughed when I got the joke if that helps.
Posted: 2010-12-22 13:42:55 Report Reply
TexBex
TexBex
Rank: #55
Yes. Yes it does. ;)
Posted: 2010-12-27 04:46:31 Report Reply
Lil jon still looks bloody retarded in the before and after pics
Posted: 2010-12-04 23:03:35 Report Reply
Wow, Tina Turner used to look like a dude.
Posted: 2010-12-02 09:31:19 Report Reply
Tremp20k
Tremp20k
Rank: #77
ya so how many of you would do Avirl Lavigne
Posted: 2010-12-02 16:24:45 Report Reply
Jozzoh
Jozzoh
Rank: #101
Every Sk8er Boi here
Posted: 2010-12-02 17:03:45 Report Reply
buddyfoeva
buddyfoeva
Rank: #8
and almost every other guy that is not stupid
Posted: 2010-12-02 18:45:00 Report Reply
Ross1793
Rank: #1488
damn it all thats bad
Posted: 2010-12-03 04:12:37 Report Reply
Lil jon still looks bloody retarded in the before and after pics
Posted: 2010-12-04 23:03:36 Report Reply

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AlbanePosted by:
Albane
Rank: #114

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